gRaviTy

cAn't brEathe

i try so hard to do wat i shd do

forcing myself

keeping it to myself

hiding it deep in my heart

it still seems useless

its torturing

my heart ache

i can't breathe

but still have to keep on

i cant stop

i deciDe

i decide to hide it,

keeping it to myself,

My future is in mist,

all i can do is to entrust everything to GOD.

uR waRm emBrace

Thank you

Lord Jesus Christ

The warmest embrace from you that i ever felt

Its more than enough to let me know

that you Love me

And you were always here for me when i cry

crying for the person that might never love me again

It has been a long time since the last hug

I thank you with all my heart.

I love You, Jesus

Your hug makes me smile

even though i'm in tears.

i beLieVe

Dear Lord..

i believe there will be a miracle

i'm waiting for it.

Pls don ever let me go.

i need u so much.

pls be here to carry me on ur back when i cry

pls be here to sing a song to me, when i'm sad

pls raise me even though i feel like giving up.

everything that u r making me go through

i know its ur will

i will not murmur even though every step i'm taking is breaking my heart

every step seperates me from the love of life

the love of my life that will never love me again

making me a finer gold.

The fire burns, the pain, the broken heart

forces tears to flow even though i'm unwilling

only u understand,

pls take my hand

to walk every step of my path with bravery

sOmeDay~

Someday u'll gonna realize

One day, u'll see this through my eyes

But then, i won't even be there

I'll be happy somewhere

Even if i can't

I know u don really see my worth

U think u're the last guy on earth

Well, i've got news for u

I know i'm not that strong

But it won't take long

Won't take long

Coz someday, someone's gonna love me

The way i wanted u to need me

Someday someone's gonna take ur place

One day i'll forget bout u

U'll see, i won't even miss u

Someday, someday

But now, i know u can tell

I'm down and i'm not doin well

But one day these tears

they will all run dry

I won't have to cry

Sweet goodbye

Coz, someday someone's gonna love me

The way i wanted u to need me

Someday, someone's gonna take ur place

wooh~

One day, i'll forget about u

U'll see, I won't even miss u

Someday, I know someone's gonna be there

Someday someone's gonna love me

The way I wanted u to need me

Someday, someone's gonna take ur place

One day , I'll forget about u

U'll see, I wont even miss u

Someday, Someday~

Ahh yeah~

hAppilY nEver aFter (nicole)

Happily never after,

seems to be a bad ending,

but look at the bright side,

its a new begining.

Happily never after

I don think i want this anymore

As she drops the ring to the floor

she said to herself ' You left before'

This time you will stay gone "thats for sure"

And he shattred something as

She dragged her suitcase down the path

To the driveway

She had never gone that far

Normally this would be

The time that she

Would let him talk her out of leaving

But this time, Without crying

As she got into her car

She said

NO..

HAPPILY NEVER AFTER

That jus ain't for me because finally

I know, i deserve better, after all

I'll never let another teardrop fall

As she drove away she starts to smile

Realized she hadn't for awhile

No destination, she drove for miles

Wonderin' why she stayed in such denial

Laughing about the way he shattred something as

She dragged her suitcase down the path

To the driveway

She had never gone that far

Normally this would be

The time that she

Would let him talk her out of leaving

But this time, without crying

As she got into her car

She said,

No..

Happily never after

That jus ain't for me, because finally

I know, i deserve better, after all

I'll never let another teardrop fall

I'm done,i'm done

Said i'm so done

So done, i'm done, i'm done

i'm free, i'm free, i'm free

free to be me

She inhales an air she never breathed before

The air of no drama, no more

She said

No..

Happily never after

That jus ain't for me, because finally

I know, i deserve better,after all

I'll never let another teardrop fall

(3X)

wEdDinG..

wedding matrimony of shen chew and pe chen,

wishing them happy forever,

the whole enviroment was filled with smiles and laughter,

but one question struck my mind,

will I ever get marry??

Its up to God.

i deCideD~

After all the pain and suffering i had been through,

i came to understand that its all not worth,

i'm not going to try anymore,

the harder i try,

the harder i knock face to the wall

the person never cares about me, my feelings

but only his own,

i will let it go according the highest will,

to have no more feeling for u in me.

u don even wish to see me,

i guess thats wat u wanted all along.

Dear Lord,

pls be the pillar of my strength,

the comfort to my sadness,

the tissue of my tears,

the teddy i needed to hug,

the one who my tape back my broken heart,

pls be with me!!!

i WanNa bE wiTh U

i pray that i could be with u,

i hope to leave this painful place,

pls take me away from all the pain and suffering

and bring me to the place where only happiness exist,

i really wanna be with u soon,

pls take me away,

i'm sure u wil take care of eberyone i love

even though i'm gone

HE liStenEd

Thank u dear Lord,

U listen to my prayer,

i'm starting to count my blessing everyday.

I'm grateful for everything,

and may everything goes in ur will :)

sImple tHing makes a difFerEnce~

yesterday, a simple question of are u okay,

jus made my day,

thank u

hOld 0n sTroNgeR~

Evon, u got to hold on.

u got ot stay strong for urself.

keep ur faith deep in ur heart

HE will come and take u when the time comes.

and bring u to a place where only happiness and goodness exist.

no matter how hard the road ahead

HE will hold ur hands

HE will guide u

HE will carry when u need a fren

He will keep his promise.

HE is always there

HE is understand how u feel

Evon, just run to him

s0ng for my heArt!

@#$%&#$@%!!!!

OMGOSH!!!!

everything is gone..

its been 3 days..

i cant log in fb, msn and my email.

lost all my contact, everything T.T

damn PEK CHEK!!!

dono which stupid idoit hack my passwords??!!!

HOPE IDOIT HOUSE GOT ELECTRIC AND WATER EVERYDAY!!
HOPE THAT WHEN U WALK U WONT POK KAI!!

GOT OUT OF THE HOUSE, NO SNATCH THEIF WILL COME TO U!!

NO CAR ACCIDENT WHEN U DRIVE!!

arhhhhh.........

.

fOot pRintS in tHe sAnd..

God was always here for me,

words cant descride my heart of gratitude to HIM,

He lift me when i was down,

Cheered for me,

Grant me wishes,

Streghten me with his big hang holding mine,

holding me in his arms without me knowing,

promising he will give the best to me and everyone,

undying love no one in this world can give,

Thank God,

Thank U.

Leona Lewis- foot prints in the sand(really nice song)

U walk with me,

foot prints in the sand,

and help me understand,

where i'm going,

u walk with me,

when i was all alone,

with so much unknown,

along the way,

then i heard you say,

i promise u,

i'm always there,

when ur heart is filled with sorrow and despair,

i'll carry u when u need a fren,

u'll find my foot prints in the sand,

i see my life,

flash across the sky,

so many times have i,

been so afraid,

and jus when i tot i've lost my way,

u gave me strenght to carry on,

there's when i heard u say,

i promise u, i'm always there,

when ur heart is filled with sorrow and despair,

and i'll carry u,when u need a fren,

u'll find my foot prints in the sand.

when i'm weary,

i'll know u will be there and i can feel u,

when u say,

i promise u,i'm always there,

when ur heart is filled with sadness and despair,

i'll carry u,when u need a fren,

u'll find my foot prints in the sand. (x2)

teaRs..

my tears are all gone.

i have become stronger.

no matter what i have to stay strong.

pls be with me.

aCcorDing t0 u~

according to u,

i found the answer,

i'm going to let it go,

i got to stand alone,

suck it all up,

swallow my tears,

and got to hold on tight to my faith,

pls be with me.

i cAn maKe iT thRougH tHe rAin!!!

when u get caught in the rain,

with no where to run,

when u're distraught and in pain without anyone,

when u keep crying out to be save,

and nobody comes.

and u feel so far away,

that u jus cant find ur way home,

you can get there alone,

its ok what u say is,



i can make it through the rain,

i can stand up once again,

on my own,

and i know that i'm strong enough to mend

and everytime i feel afraid i hold tighter to my faith,

and i live one more day, i can make it through the rain



and if u keep falling down, don u dare give in

u will arise safe and sound,

so keep pressing on steadfastly,

and you'll find wat u need to prevail

wat u say is,



i can make it through the rain,

i can stand up once again,

on my own,

and i know that i'm strong enough to mend,

and everytime i feel afraid,

i hold tighter to my faith,

and i live one more day,

i can make it through the rain,



and when the rain blows, and shadow grow close,

don be afraid,there is nothing u cant face,

and should they tell u,u'll never pull through,

don hesitate,stand tall and say



i can make it through the rain,

i can stand up once again,

on my own,

and i know, that i'm strong enough to mend,

and everytime i feel afraid i hold tighter to my faith,

and i live one more day, i can make it through the rain.




i can make it throough the rain,

as i live once again,

and i live one more day,

i can make it through the rain,

YES U CAN,

you gonna make it through the rain.

aPple , honEy

I jus fin my final exam..

so i'm back in blogging abit..haha :p

My exam was not really that bad.

Studied according to tips.

And the tips really help alot.. :D

Thanks to saki (a fren) who is willing to share it to everyone.

i dint get the tips from him tho~

but i get it from another good fren (N).

Hope to get at least a "C" for every subject.

May God help me ^.^

cross fingers (xXXXx)

Okie..get back to the topic.

all natural

apple cider vinegar and honey

i found out that apple cider vinegar and honey is a great zit fix.

not only for pimples but also moisture, exfoliation and etc.

i jus wanna share this great news with

those who have pimples like me.

it's cheap, natural and easy to get anywhere.

it helps me abit coz i jus started about a week or so.

and i can already see some diffences.

Thank GoD for his wonderful creation.

I don dare to instruct u in wat to do with it.

but i advice u to do some research on the internet.

from there u will find everything about them.

It may or may not work for u coz everyone

has diffent types of skin

May these natural stuff help u~

all the best!

!

fEelinGs f0r U..

I have brought myself to realize that u are really amazing.

Ur power, ur love, ur fairness, ur heart, ur strenght, ur EVERYTHING.

makes me feel that i'm such a lucky person to chosen.

Its a gift..a bonus from heaven.

I might be just a tiny sand to u

but u still love me though.

Yesterday, i told my fren about u

and how science has proven ur exixtence

makes me feel glad and happy from inside out.

Thank U LORD for being by me all the time.

Sometimes life is smooth and sometimes its full of holes, causes me to fall.

But u make it with a purpose to refine me into a purer Gold.

Thank U is the simplest word to describe my feeling now.

I pray in my deepest heart that i will never ever leave u,

and if someday i do..pls don ever let go of my tiny and fragile hands.

f0rGet tHe Past aNd waLk t0waRds fuTurE

I have come to understand about changing is not a bad thing to do.

my bro advised me to stop being so stubborn head.

And also wat Ah wei told about love of GOD for us.

And i think through it and i guess i shd change

to make myself be a happier person.

forgeting the past and walk towards the future.

forget all the unhappy incidents

and only rmb those that were happy.

Maybe it might be hard for me at first

but i guess i am able to do it.

May God help me.

May He be with me always as i need him.

Prayer really helps me alot.

May happiness be with u all and also myself.

Thank God :)

i really wish

i really wish that i didnt know u my whole life.

i truely wish that nothing ever happen between us,

I'm tired of everything,

lies...again and again and again,

only me, being stupid to believe in u,

too dumb to trust u,

even more foolish to fall in love with u.

i'm speechless after all i had sacrifice for u,

i get nothing,

but lies, heartache, and tears.

i really wish that i never knew u.

i really have to learn to let go now.

evon pls.. jus let go of ur hands

.

hAnd~

Dear Lord, I need your hands to lift me up from this pain.

Please show me the path i should take to continue my journey of life.

Are u there stading by my side, LORD ?

Please help me.

i"m in great trouble and dilemma.

I feel like i'm in the dark searching for help.

And i'm afraird that God will not help.

I need you to be there for me Oh Lord.

Please.. i really need you God.

teArs of My heArt

Sometimes i really feel like leaving this world and join God
leaving this world might not a bad suggestion.
i have been trying so hard to fit in,
giving and forgiving,
trying to do my best,
trying to be myself,
trying to adapt,
trying to improve,
wanted happiness,
wanted love,
wanted the sense of belonging,
wanted to be pampered,
thinking how to be better in person and in everything.
but i get nothing in return.
everything is vanity.

tHe BegiNinG.

Last 2 weeks, i had a really hard
when i receive comment from peoples.
Saying i did last minute work
and i don really care bout my assignment.
i don blame them becoz i admit
i did last min work but i did finish it.
and i care about my assignment.
i had changed but u doesn't seem to acknowledge it..
i accept the criticism with open heart
and made amendments on my own working style.
but on the other hand, u doubt and
judge my capability after changing myself to adapt.
doubting and judging my ability really hurts me
and make me really mad.
this matter really disappoint me
i really don understand what make u doubt
and why u doubt my ability.
but i jus wanna say..
no one has the right's to judge and
question another person's capability in doing their job.
this is becoz u never know how good they r
b4 they do the work properly.
and u r are not qualified enough to judge
becoz u r not the boss.
I was sad and hurt b4 this
but now i understand that,
life do goes up and down.
in life it is a definite that some people likes u
and some don.
I don know why...
but i choose to think positive now.
maybe they r jus jealous or jus don like me.
or maybe some other reasons.

aDdictiVe..

Love is addictive
When u have it u will feel very happy.
When u lose it u will feel very sad.
When u r trying to adapt of losing it,
Only u yourself can help yourself.
Love is like drug..
U will get addicted to it.
May GOD strengthen those is trying to adapt of losing love.
Help ME, and everyone who need it.

nIce bUt a fAiluRe to hEr..

This is wat Dr chose over my love design.. T.T
Wat da tuu.. kolot taste.. SIENZZZZ

thE cliMb.

Every step i'm taking,
every move i make feels lost with no direction,
my faith is shackin,
but i, i gotta keep tryin,
gotta keep my head held high.
the struggles i'm facing,
the chances i'm taking,
Sometimes might knock me down but,
NO i'm not breaking,
i may not know it,
but these are the moments that,
I'm gonna remember most,
jus gotta keep going,
and i, i gotta be strong,
jus keep pushing on..

i wAs wRonG

I was wrong bout love..
love is not a tattoo.
it's jus a story written on a piece on paper using a pencil.
It can be rub away easily with eraser.
love can just stop suddenly when the writer stops writing.

i'lL kEep taT in mInd

today, monday, 8:47 p.m
you said that we have nothing in between.
that very moment,tears grow in my eyes.
but i hold back..even the phrase aches my heart deep.
its the fact that i cant accept these years.
and i finally heard from his mouth..
i'll remind myself every time when i wanna do something with, to and for u
i'll refrain myself..and u have to do the same to lessen the pain in the future.
i understand love cant be force..
i'll leave bit by bit.


i hope 2010 may comes soon..

l0vE!!

love is like a tattoo..
once its tattooed on your body..
it will never leave u even when u die..
I LOVE YOU!!!!!!
TATS ALL I WANTED TO SAY.

I kn0w...

I know how i feel for u all this years..
i know it may or may not have a chance..
thinking about it aches my heart..
tears flowing out from heart..
hopes may disappoint me..
hopeless brings no happiness..
Cruel fact is coming soon..
leaving is walking towards us.

THank GoD..

One word.. thank GOD.
jus like she said..
7 is not a number but a bond and relationship between frens that will not
break easily in the past,prensent and also in the future

feD uP and diSsapointed!!

Now i realize that the truth can be twisted and turn
if u know how to act and talk to get ppl's sympathy.
making us the bad person.
This matter does not only happen outside church but also inside.

Appreciated and Loved

Blowing a kiss to my every family member, Sevenz, Qimei, jia hao,

N,Chean,mei mei, carina, puikei, doris, ah long ge, wei rong..

I don care even if its embarassing.

I really LOVE U GUYS ALOT ALOT!!!!

U guys make me laugh and even make me cry before but i don give a damn.

Coz i think u guys are jus the person that still cares for me..

thank u guys so much..

i really appreciate u guys alot.

w0rds aS shaRp as kNife.

Imagine the person u love so much saying u stick with them

becoz u "mou yan mou mat" in kanto

(means no frens, family or anyone)

That statement stab through my heart with a great impact.

That statement was sharp as a knife.

leaving my heart feeling agony.

leaving my heart bleed.

That statement also wakes me up after my long sleep telling me,

i really don have much frens, family or anyone that really cares bout me.

in a harsh saying,

i'm jus a pathetic person.

c0nfuSed..

Sometimes and somehow,

I'm confused in the way things goes.

Somtimes it goes the way u wanted,

But sometimes it don't.

Which way should i choose to continue my journey?

leArn mY leSson..

Went for badminton yesterday with frens and bro.

Use to much of energy and too long didnt exercise d.

Today become "chan fei" d.

Whole body pain.

Even my butt also pain.. T.T

Learn my lesson..

have to warm up b4 playing the sport and exersice more.

I nEed a haNd.

All things seems to be far away,

No one is here to hold my hand,

I have to walk this journey all alone,

Hope it ends as soon as possible.

shut uP!!

One word.. shut the f*%$ up when u are watching the movie in the cinema.

Coz if u r talking, u r disturbing others.

Plz be a bit more CONSIDERATE!!!!

If u wanna talk..then buy DVD back to watch at home.

U wanna talk or even scream..it's up u.

Jus shut up when u r in the cinema.

i wiSh..

I wish to leave here as soon as possible.

tHank GOD

Thank god i have my family.

Thank god i have all my crazy and good frens.

Thank god i learned to love someone with all my heart.

Thank god i was hurt by ppl to make me grow.

Thank god for showing me the reality of human nature that is.. f*&%king selfish ppl

Thank god i'm not his gf or wife

coz thinking back he is jus a person who only thinks for himself

and never care for other ppls feeling.

And he never ever understand all i wanted was his understanding and support.

Thank god that he hurts me till i cry coz

he, making me cry is indirectly telling me that he don love me.

And that is the answer i wanted long ago...

Thank god...

nEveR lo0k bacK.

Never look back unless u have chosen that path,

Never look back if u wan to proceed in ur life,

Coz the past will not come back again,

The past will not last,

Let not the past rib ur future,

Erase the past and march to the future,

Let the past be the past,

Jus apprecite everyday becoz u might not know wat will happen tmr,

Tmr might be a miracle..

we are a miracle too...

So, ponder about it.

afteR thE teAr dr0ps oF heAven.

After the tear drops of heaven,

i have faith,

there awaits a beautiful rainbow.

GOD always sents rainbow after rain.

Reminding us to stand up tall again after we fell down

and he is always there for us.

i haD d0ne the corRect deciSion.

U come to me when u needed someone and when u needed help..

When u don need me, u go to ur frens, ur family

and i'm completely forgotten.

I gave u sincere heart

but this is wat u gave me.

it breaks my heart but u never care at all.

but why??

i guess i did the correct decision to let go.

BEAUTIFUL TOMB

난 내 감정을 묻으면된다,

침묵은 무덤처럼,

내가 내 마음에 깊숙히 묻어 것이다.

시체처럼 땅 속에 묻혀있다.

그리고 곧 그것을 잊어버린 것이다.

leArn a leSson..

PPL..never ever put ur mobile phone or wallet on the table while

you are eating in any mamak or restaurants.

Coz those clumsy or half awake person

will surely forget to take ur belongings with them when they r going back.

ESSPEACIALLY when they r in a hurry..

I left my phone once in the class also

Luckily and thank GOD my fren pass it back to me.

And this time it's my fren NGE CHEE YANG who left his phone at the mamak.

But thank God also the mamak workers are not greedy.

If not, sure gone.

FREE

I'm free now.

I don need to wonder r u thinking of me or do u miss me?

I don need to care for someone who don care bout me..

or Am i being replace by someone?

our story ends here.

why?? i nEveR unDerstaNd..

why when i treat ppl with my heart they alwaays make me dissapointed?

Why when i love u the most but u love someone else more.?

Why when i am willing to give u my all even to suffer for u,

u cant even give me a little bit of understand?

why u always expect me to be understanding but u never were to me?

i really love u but why u treat me in this way.

why u guys always make me feel that i'm jus a replacement when ur favorite is not here?

why am i always the replacement one?

u guys are forcing me to love u lesser and lesser?

and if thats the only path left for me to take to make me happier.

i guess i will.